How Jesus set moms (& women) free

Mother's Day in the Kingdom of Heaven

In Disney's Encanto, there is a song that connects to many in regards to modern motherhood: Surface Pressure.

I'm the strong one, I'm not nervous. I'm as tough as the crust of the Earth is. I move mountains, I move churches. And I glow 'cause I know what my worth is. I don't ask how hard the work is...I take what I'm handed, I break what's demanded, but—Under the surface, I feel berserk as a tightrope walker in a three-ring circus. Under the surface...I'm pretty surе I'm worthless if I can't be of servicе.

Another way of saying this is: “My identity is wrapped up in my ability to be all things for my family. Even if it almost kills me.”

While on Mother's Day of all days, I am not trying to lump all mothers into a group (a dangerous thing to do!), but I will say that most mothers feel incredible pressure to be All-The-Things and Do-All-The-Things. I know this is not limited to just moms, but to women in general. Cultural and religious messages tell women: I'm pretty sure I'm worthless if I can't be of service.

I don't need to recite here the confusing, unending cultural ideals and idolatry of motherhood that immerse women. If you are a woman (or even if you are not), you know them well. Women, particularly conservative Christian women, breathe these ideals like oxygen. Like our lives depend on it. I am a Bible-believing-orthodox-living-Wesleyan-rooted kind of woman, and I have good news for women—Or rather Jesus does!

Jesus has a message to modern motherhood that is as timeless as the kingdom of God.

Your worth and identity is not in motherhood with its cultural or religious expectations. Jesus said this in an in-your-face kinda way. There is this strange little verse sounds like Jesus is insulting His mom, but instead is inaugurating a whole other way for mothers to be set free.

Jesus is teaching on prayer in a crowd in Luke 11:

As Jesus was saying these things, a woman in the crowd called out, “Blessed is the mother who gave you birth and nursed you.”

He replied, “Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it.”

What is happening here?

In those days (which seem remarkably similar to today), a woman's identity was in her relationship to men. That has not changed much. But even more, she could not hold property, represent herself in court, or even hold legal authority over her children. As a Jewish ancient woman, her goal would have been to give birth to a male child--therefore, connecting her destiny with patriarchal family lineage. The ultimate identity for a woman would be to bear a male child who may be a rabbi or even the prophesied Messiah.

So, here, the woman is giving Jesus's mother the ultimate compliment: "Blessed is your mother!"

And Jesus turns around and seems to criticize his mom. "No, actually, let me tell you who is blessed." The one who is blessed is the disciple.

What Jesus did here was set women free.

No longer will women's deepest blessing come from children.

No longer will women's identity be tied up in birthing and nursing babies.

No longer will women’s worth be rooted in the womb.

No longer will women's highest ideal be to birth and raise babies.

No longer will women’s kingdom of God status be in motherhood.

Instead, women—Your deepest identity is in discipleship!

Your deepest identity is not in raising kids, but in seeking God.

Mic drop right here. Really, cue the parade, trumpets, and confetti. This is such a big deal.

This changes everything for women. Of course, families and babies are extremely important to God. This isn't to limit their importance in God’s eyes. Raising a family and caring for babies is one of the most significant ways we can contribute to the kingdom of heaven.

But instead: Mom, your identity is not in your children. This is the biggest Mother's Day gift of all. Your worth, identity, value, and purpose are not ultimately in the broad of humans you birthed, nor in the ones you never birthed. Your identity is not in your babies, but it is in your God.

So today, while it is a good and right thing to celebrate moms for their care, love, and sacrificial service, don't make the mistake of tying identity to motherhood.

The pressure that women feel to be mothers and do all the things is cultural and religious idolatry—it is not the way of the Gospel! Sacrificial love is part of the way of Christ, but that is not the same as the expectations and pressure that are put on women to conform to a certain set of obligations around motherhood.

Woman, you are set free!

That’s Good News for Mother’s Day!